The Unexpected Rescue

"Demon King!" the hero bellowed, brandishing his sword. "By decree of His Majesty, I have come to rescue the princess. Release her at once, or face the consequences!"

The Demon Lord's shoulders slumped with visible relief. "Oh, thank the dark gods. Please, take her. I deeply regret this whole kidnapping business."

Taken aback, the hero lowered his sword slightly. "I... what?"

"My darling!" The Demon Lord flinched as the princess's voice echoed from another room. "Where are you hiding? I've found the most darling matching outfits for us!"

"Listen," the Demon Lord whispered urgently, his body shivering uncontrollably as he recalled his ordeal, "I've made a terrible mistake. I thought kidnapping a princess would be villainous fun, but it's been a nightmare. Do you know how many shopping trips I've been forced to endure? The endless tea parties? The redecorating?" His voice quavered, and he wrapped his arms around himself as if trying to ward off the memories.

The hero stood dumbfounded. "But... you're supposed to resist! We're meant to have an epic battle!"

"Battle? Ha! I'll pay you to take her away," the Demon Lord said, eyes darting nervously to the door. He snapped his fingers, conjuring a bag of gold. "Here's 1000 gold pieces. Double it if you all leave in the next five minutes."

The hero's eyes widened at the gold. "Well, I suppose a peaceful resolution is preferable..."

Just then, the princess burst into the room, arms full of frilly clothes. Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What's going on here?"

The Demon Lord quickly adopted a menacing pose. "Curses! This valiant hero has defeated me in... uh, psychic combat! I am utterly vanquished!"

The princess pouted. "But darling, we were having such a lovely time! Surely you can defeat one little hero?"

"I'm afraid not, my dear," the Demon Lord said, feigning weakness. "His righteous... thoughts... are too powerful. You must go with him now."

"I won't leave you!" the princess declared, clinging to the Demon Lord's arm.

The hero, catching on, cleared his throat. "Princess, I'm afraid I must insist. The kingdom is in peril without you. There's a... terrible plague affecting all the puppies and kittens in the land. Only your gentle touch can cure them."

The princess gasped. "The poor dears! We must leave at once!" She turned to the Demon Lord. "Farewell, my dark prince. I'll never forget our time together."

As the hero escorted the princess out, the Demon Lord pressed the bag of gold into his hands, mouthing a silent "thank you."

Once alone, the Demon Lord collapsed into his throne, exhaling deeply. He made a mental note: next time, kidnap a dragon instead.